Dirt

The project this weekend was to fill in the pond. It has been empty for a few weeks and we were finally able to borrow a truck so that we could go buy the necessary quantities of dirt. That's right. We had to buy dirt.

Thankfully the truck just managed to squeeze through the back gate. It would have been a lot harder if Aaron would have had to bring the dirt in with a wheel barrow.

The hole is now completely full and awaiting a layer of top soil. That will be a project for another time though as we want to pack and level the dirt and rearrange the pavers to make a nice seating area. So for right now it is a make shift sand box. The boys love it!

Jeremiah preferred to be productive in the dirt. Digging holes, moving rocks etc. He hardly got dirty at all. Nathaniel on the other hand:

Go ahead and report us to child services. This kid has been eating dirt since he was a baby....

You can imagine all the places we found dirt on this kid. Covered from head to toe (and in his diaper and on his scalp and in between his toes and under his fingernails and behind his ears....).

Meeting Jesus

Out of my bondage, sorrow and night,
Jesus I come, Jesus I come
Into Thy freedom, gladness and light
Jesus I come to Thee
Out of my sickness into Thy health
Out of my wanting into Thy wealth
Out of my sin and into Thyself
Jesus I come to Thee

Out of the fear and dread of the tomb
Jesus I come, Jesus I come
Into the joy and light of Thy home
Jesus I come to Thee
Out of the depths of ruin untold
Into the peace of Thy sheltering fold
Ever Thy glorious face to behold
Jesus I come to Thee

Death looks different when you love Jesus. There is a peace. A desire to be home. And when you love the person dying you have that same peace and desire despite your own sorrow.

Aaron's Grannie is in the hospital. Her cancer has advanced and she is facing the end of her earthly days. We have been bringing the boys to visit her at the hospital with a special emphasis this weekend on the fact that this could be the last time they see her here on earth. Jeremiah is hesitant to approach the bed, but informs me daily that he wants to visit Grannie and to sing to her. He brings his children's Bible so that he can read her stories. Nathaniel willingly gives her hugs and kisses, and yesterday sweetly held her hand and prayed "gee-jus gannie feel better."

Grannie's prayer is that she go home to be with her Saviour. She is tired and in pain and is ready to be home. This afternoon our little family, joined by Steve & Brenda (Aaron's parents), Caleb & Monica, and Cherise stood around her bed and sang. We were led in prayer by our pastor. It was a sweet moment and we felt God's presence.

Some of Aaron's family do not trust in Jesus for their salvation. To them death is frightening and they despair when they think that this goodbye will be forever. Pray that we would have the strength to show them the light of the Gospel in the midst of sorrow.

Train Table!

The newest arrangement in the sunroom since we got a train table for the boys (gotta love Craigslist!). This is the view from the front door by the carport. I like how there is now a cozy, distinct conversation area on the right, and room for the boys table and toys (translate "mess") just out of sight on the left.

This is the opposite view from the back door. Just in case you care about stuff like that....

I think the train table will be a great asset. We have been collecting some Thomas trains since Jeremiah was 2 but have never really played with them because there was no convenient place to put them. This should also work for Lego's, craft projects, cars, etc.

Notice the sibling rivalry here. We are learning to share....

The first afternoon of play was a success! Let's hope this table facilitates hours of fun for the boys and maybe a little break for me if they can learn to play together without needing me to help. :-)

Glimpses of grace

What a great comment my friend made in my last post! We need to preach the gospel to our children every day just like we need to preach the gospel to ourselves every day! And it truly does my heart glad when I get the glimpses of grace that glimmer through in the lives of my boys.
Like last Sunday when Jeremiah walked door to door with us handing out flyers to invite kids to VBS at our church. It did not bother him a bit to knock on doors in the "questionable" neighborhood and happily quip, "Hello, my name is Jeremiah. I would like to invite you to our Bible school!" with a big smile.
Like when I hear Jeremiah start singing a worship song at the top of his lungs in the middle of Wal-mart, completely out of the blue. Sure we drew some strange looks from people, but my son was praising Jesus!
Like when Nathaniel insists on praying before meal time and his sweet little voice says, "tank gee-sus food, tank gee-sus Eli n Shanna, tank gee-sus go outside. amen!"
Like when Nathaniel gets excited, jumping up and down and clapping his hands saying "sing songs gee-jus!" when I tell him it is Sunday morning and we get to go to church.
And even when Jeremiah corrects me saying, "Mama, you should not speak in an angry tone of voice. It is not kind and loving."
God promises to be faithful to the generations of those who seek Him. I choose to claim those promises and continue to look for those glimpses of grace!

On total depravity

A conversation I overheard this morning reminded me of the need Jeremiah has for a Savior and in turn my need for one as well.

Jeremiah: How do I get my sin back?
Aaron: What do you mean?
J: You know, the sin that Jesus took. How do I get it back?
A: proceeds to give a short, 4 year old appropriate narrative of sin, how it keeps us from God and how Jesus righteousness covers it when he died on the cross ending with, do you want to be with God?
J: No, I don't think so.

The theology of total depravity (everyone is born sinful) is not a happy thing to think about. People tend to want to avoid it saying that they believe people are basically good. However, I know that I have only to look into my own heart to know that aside from Christ's work in me my sins of selfishness, anger, laziness and pride (just to name a few) would take total control over my life. Having children has shown me the sinfulness that lurks in human hearts on a totally different level.
Jeremiah's statement this morning shows with simple childlike truth what the Bible teaches us. That even our salvation is not a work of our own. If left on our own in our sin we would not even want to be with God. Yet, God, out of infinite love, reaches to us and saves us. He uses the Spirit to turn our hearts toward Him.
There is not doubt that my children need a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. It is not guaranteed that they will love Jesus just because they are growing up in a Christian home, attending church every Sunday, learning to be polite, and being taught how to be "good people." As a mother I pray every day that my boys will be brought by the Spirit to see the depth of their sin, their need for a Savior. I pray they become men who love God more than anything on this earth and serve Him with their whole hearts and lives. The conversation I heard this morning reminded me that these prayers are not just nice "Christian-eze" prayers that I do because I have to. I was reminded that there is battle raging around us that we cannot see with physical eyes and the souls of my children are at stake.

Adoption as an outworking of the gospel

God put me in the world of social work my second year out of college. I had no experience with the state foster care and adoption system but needed a job and thought working with kids would be fun. Foster care and adoption became my passion.
It has been my opinion for a long time now that Christians need to move beyond paying lip service to the pro-life position and make caring for orphans (and foster children) a practical outworking of the gospel within our churches. When I heard about this book, I knew I had to read it. It arrived today and I have been "amening" over and over again. Aaron is getting sick of me reading quotes out loud to him. This book goes in depth about how our theology of the gospel must bring an adoption mindset.

The gospel of Jesus Christ means our families and churches ought to be at the forefront of the adoption of orphans close to home and around the world. As we become more attuned to the gospel, we'll have more of a burden for orphans. As be become more adoption friendly, we'll be better able to understand the gospel. ... In this book I want to call us all to consider how encouraging adoption - whether we adopt or whether we help others adopt - can help us peer into the ancient mystery of our faith in Christ and can help us restore the fracturing unity and the atrophied mission of our congregations.
It is one thing when the culture doesn't "get" adoption. What else could one expect when all of life is seen as the quest of "selfish genes" for survival? It is one thing when the culture doesn't "get" adoption and so speaks of buying a cat as "adopting" a pet. But when those who follow Christ think the same way, we betray that we miss something crucial about our own salvation.

I am only half way through but I know that I already recommend this book. If you already have a heart for adoption you will be encouraged. If you have considered adoption but think of it as a "second best alternative" to having biological children you may find your heart changed. If you know that adoption is not something you can do at this time in your life you may be spurred to find ways to help others who are adopting. It can only build your faith to delve deeply into your personal adoption as God's child!

Unplugging

The summer is literally flying by. I realized with a shock this morning that we only have 3 more weeks until Aaron goes back to work again (shh, don't mention it to him, he is in denial)! I have not been spending as much time as usual in front of the computer or TV for a number of different reasons.
First, our days are full of other things. With the house still needing work and unpacking still to be done there is always something to do. No two days have been the same. We take little trips, we go for walks, we invite people over for dinner, we start a project in the yard. By the end of the day I realize that I just haven't had a spare moment for electronic entertainment.
Second, we deliberately decided not to renew our satellite TV subscription so we literally cannot watch TV.
Third, having Aaron around shows me how much time I can waste in front of the computer. When I know that he is taking over caring for the kids, or in the middle of a project, or whatever I am more aware of the actual amount of time I spend on the computer so I am more conscience of what I am doing.

Now, at the risk of sounding over-spiritual and "goody-goody" let me explain to you what I have observed about this "unplugging" that has occurred over the past few weeks.
1. Being bombarded by media images does effect my mindset. I am finding it much easier to have a godly view of what it means to be a wife, mother, friend, and lover of Christ without the influence of worldly thoughts, materialism etc. on my mind. The messages that I see on TV subtly and quietly cloud my view and cause me to doubt what is clear in the Word.
2. Not being disciplined in how I schedule computer time has a direct influence on my kids behavior. It is absolutely ludicrous of me to expect my kids to be kind, loving, and thoughtful if they are having to compete with the computer for my attention. They need and deserve my attention and we have a much more pleasant day when I am disciplined about getting on the computer only when they are napping or in bed for the night.
3. My priorities should be as follows; God, husband, children. I am realizing that the time I spend in front of the TV or computer directly influences the way I view my priorities. There are a lot of great shows, blogs, games etc. out there. But unless they are helping me love Jesus, my husband, or my kids better they are simply a waste of my time.
4. Electronic entertainment sucks energy away from relationships. It's true. It's not popular to say that, but it is true. I have seen a great improvement in my relationship with my husband and children because we interact with each other more. It is amazing the conversations that we have and the fun we invent when watching TV is just not an option for "what to do tonight?" Facebook is fun for keeping up with people superficially, but a phone call or visit is 10 times better!
5. I have had so much more time for reading! I have been enjoying reading lots of novels but am also stretching my mind with books about the environment, biographies, and books to encourage my spiritual walk. And of course having more time to read the Bible is changing my daily life in so many ways.

We are not throwing out our computer or TV anytime soon. We enjoy keeping up with friends on Facebook, reading blogs, using Skype, and finding great deals on Craigslist. We enjoy watching movies and some select TV shows on DVD. But as with all things we are finding that discipline and moderation are needed and wise.

Summer Thoughts

Some of my random thoughts recently:
* We are so blessed to have this summer completely free with Aaron home! We are enjoying every moment and taking full advantage of the long summer days. We are doing projects around the house, resting, and having lots of people over for meals and fun.
* I am not missing our TV at all!
* Somewhere in our garden beds lurks poison ivy that I have not yet identified but that has left me looking like a strange monster from a B-rated horror flick. I have a nasty rash on my face, arms and fingers. Not fun.
* I have been spending less time on-line and, like the lack of TV, am finding this better for my over-all well being. (I will probably blog more on this at a later date.)
* I am reading Hot, Flat, and Crowded by Thomas Friedman and finding it very interesting.
* If you haven't read anything by Barbara Kingsolver you should!
* My husband is an amazing, incredible, patient man who deserves more love, time, and attention than I give him.
* I would happily be a vegetarian during the summer months with all the lovely fresh produce that is available. Our Monday evening visits to the farmers market is always anticipated. The vendors like to see the boys coming and last week Jeremiah and Nathaniel scored free Yoo-Hoo. I think Jeremiah thought it was the nectar of the Gods.
* Craigslist rocks! I will never again pay retail for appliances. We picked up an almost brand new portable dishwasher the other day for $100! (retails for over $600!). We are now on the hunt for an extra freezer.
* Icecream eaten out of a cone does have a special taste that smacks of childhood and summer.
* My baby is about to turn 2 and I am envisioning this home with a few more little people in it. My thoughts are turning to fostering and adopting and I am in great prayer and anticipation for what God may have in store.
* I forgot about the tender feelings of 4 year olds in the process of giving away the fish in the pond. My mother's heart cracked a bit when Jeremiah cried heart wrenching sobs and accused us of hurting his feelings when the fish went to their new home. We are in the process of seeing if a turtle or fish aquarium will make a good addition to our home and fulfill Jeremiah's desire for a pet of his own.