It's funny how at the most random moments in the midst of every day life something will happen to bring back floods of memories of my youth. This morning as I was climbing wearily out of bed and starting my morning routine of coaxing Jeremiah out of his pj's and wrestling with Nathaniel as he fought my attempts to wipe his runny nose the phone rang. A friend from church told me that the host of NBC's Today Show was broadcasting from Amsterdam. Thanks to the modern convenience of the DVR I was able to pause the programming and after settling Jeremiah with some breakfast and Nathaniel with some toys I sat on the couch with a cup of coffee and was transported back to the memories of my teenage years as Matt Lauer roamed the streets of the city that I knew so well.
The image of the new green on the trees along the canals and the clear light of a warming spring afternoon reminded me of crisp spring days spent with friends skipping school and exploring the city. I still believe that there is a special quality to the air in Amsterdam on a spring afternoon. A sort of magic is conjured by the dancing light on the water and the fairy tale charm of the old houses perched in rows along the canals, no two just alike. The spirit suddenly feels light and giddy with the ability to enjoy the warmth and light after months spent in damp, dark winter. I have memories of walking along the canals pausing to look in shop windows. Quickly dodging bikers zipping through the streets. Stopping in a perfect spot of sun on a bridge to stand on my toes and kiss my boyfriend. Sitting outside at a cafe to enjoy a cool beer and wile away the afternoon talking, smoking, and watching people pass by.
Tomorrow is Queen's Day. The offical day to party. The city becomes almost unrecognizable as the streets pack with people dressed in orange milling about shoulder to shoulder drinking, singing, and generally having a good time. Bands play. Boats clog the canals. It is a day when everyone is friendly and you never meet a stranger. My memories of Queen's Day include sitting in the window of my grandparent's apartment on one of the main canals in the city just watching the humanity pass by. Riding the train into town with friends and pulling beers out of a back pack we had brought so that we didn't have to spend all our money on overpriced drink. Marveling at the unreserved abandon of a people who are usually quite reserved and quiet.
The gift (and curse) of adolescence is the ability to completely inhabit the moment you are in. Each hour is either the best or the worst hour of your life. There is little thought for the past or the consequences for the future. That intensity of emotion of course makes my memories of time spent in Amsterdam that much more vivid. For a few minutes this morning I was transported back to the days of my adolescence - that is, until I was jerked back to the reality of my life now by the sounds of my 3 year old spilling his breakfast on the floor and the feeling of my 8 month old trying to chew on my leg to ease the pain of his teething.
I wonder what my intense, idealistic 16 year old self would think about the 31 year old woman I have become and the life I am now leading?
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